Wednesday, October 14, 2009

What is Date Night?

Date night is something Arica and I planned while Braden was still cooking. We enjoy a close relationship and relish the opportunity to spend time together. We knew a baby would make it difficult to focus on our relationship on most days. For this reason we wanted to plan a day every week just for us. This way we could stay connected as a loving couple rather than becoming only partners in child raising much like Smith and Wesson were partners in gun making.

I know many people follow this same type of plan. If you are a couple that does not practice a regular date night then I highly recommend it. It works wonders for stress reduction and happiness production.

Tuesday night is our regular date night. Sometimes we do the traditional dinner and a movie. Many nights we just stay home and cook a nice meal for each other. I like to cook theme meals for Italian or Japanese nights. Not long ago we had a Caribbean night complete with Rum punch. Other nights Arica will cook some of my home cooked favorites. We may go shopping. We may on that rare occasion even head out of town to Little Rock for the evening. The only thing that is important is that we spend our time focused on each other.

Of course you need someone to watch the kids for this night to be successful. Arica and I are lucky to have her Mom living nearby. She takes Braden on Tuesdays for us. Without her date night would not be possible.

We need date night because life as a parent is sometimes so difficult that your inner parent will destroy and eat your inner husband or wife. Obviously you cannot kill the inner parent. You need him. So the only way to keep a balance is to strengthen your inner spouse so he can live alongside the inner parent. Romantic dinners, flowers, movies, walks in the park, live music, or anything else you and your partner enjoy is a great way to strengthen your inner spouse. Romantic outings are to the inner spouse what spinach is to Popeye.

My inner spouse loves spinach, and I love date night. It gives Arica and I a needed break from the stress of full time parenting. It also allows us to remain strong in our relationship so that we can provide a happy home for Braden. I think that is one of our most important responsibilities as parents.

I encourage you to set a day this week and spend some quality alone time with your significant other. By doing so you are saving your inner husband or wife. If you don't care for that relationship then it can die. So don't wait until it's too late.


PJ Mullen said...

I couldn't agree with you more. We too have a willing grandparent close by, but we don't have date nights nearly as often as we should. When little man was younger we weren't that brave being too far from him, but now that he is older we've even gone to the movies. I know, it sounds quite pathetic to think just a few years ago we would have thought nothing of an impromptu road trip is we have some PTO to spare.

Brandy said...

I can't wait to have date night again. We haven't got to because we live the crazy nana and won't leave G with her. So when we move in our own house - we can have a family member come stay with him. yay.

Oh and since this is about you - not me. good point.

Baby News said...

I completely agree...unfortunately, we're one of those couples that has no family around, so weekly date nights are impossible. AND when family does come to town (even if they were here 2 weeks ago), they seem to think we should spend EVERY SINGLE SECOND with them. My MIL is crazy like that. Extreme. We do try to meet for lunch once a week. Right now, it's the best we got! Good for you guys. Each other time is oh-so-very important!

WeaselMomma said...

I completely agree. Sometimes life gets crazy and we have a hard time stealing time for ourselves. However, we have turned even a quick run to the grocery store into some of the most fun filled and romantic of dates.

otin said...

Only a southern man would compare his true love to the bond between Smith and Wesson!! LMAO!! Just kidding man!! haha!

seashore subjects said...

The best part of having a teen at home is the built-in babysitter for just such occasions. It is her biweekly contribution to our family.

Rob said...

I agree with you. Date night is essential to keeping things nice and fresh and happy. Melinda and I do this maybe once every every week or two but we try to get out even if it is just to run errands with no kids.