Monday, February 22, 2010

Dear Albert Pujols

I know that you are busy down in Jupiter Florida.  Full squad spring training workouts start tomorrow. I am sure you and your teammates have plenty to do preparing to defend your NL Central crown. Believe me, as a Cardinal fan for 25 years I would never do anything to derail your preparation for a new season. Much of my summer is spent following your glorious pursuits on the baseball diamond.

You are my favorite player. I remember when you entered the league in 2001.  Tony didn't want to bring you North with the team, but an injury to the ancient Bobby Bonilla gave you a spot on the roster.  You got a hit in that first game in Colorado and the rest, as they say, is history.

More to my point I saw a video on the web yesterday of you working with your oldest son AJ.  You were throwing batting practice, and he was hitting rockets around the cage.  I guess the normal Dad would now use this time to ask you for tips on teaching his son to hit like a big leaguer.

Well, as you can see, I am not the normal Dad. If I were I would not be so confidently penning this letter to my favorite baseball player.  I would not be posting this letter to the world where there is a possibility that you will read it and have a restraining order placed on me.

Because I am not normal I will not ask the standard question.  My question to you is, "Will you please fly me and my son to spring training this year so you can work with him on his swing." Yes I know he is only 15 months old and some people might think it is a little early to start serious instruction.  I disagree. Tiger Woods started at such an age and look how well it turned out for him.

Scratch that last thought.

Nevertheless, I would love an opportunity to work on my son's swing with you in Florida or anywhere else. I prefer Florida though because it is nice and warm. My son, Braden, has a great cut already.  He can swing full force at a ball on a tee and hit it every time.  He drive liners off furniture, walls, down the hall, and off me if I am not ready. Believe me, a lifelong baseball enthusiast, that he is ready to receive your instruction.

I appreciate your prompt response to this matter, and I look forward to working with you.

Your Friend,
Otter

P.S. I have enclosed a photo of Braden's swing for you to study prior to our arrival in Jupiter.

12 comments:

PJ Mullen said...

I sent a similar letter to Tom Brady last year. He wouldn't return my calls either, some nonsense about rehabbing a knee injury.

Katherine said...

"Scratch that last thought." LOL!

Great post, and I love the picture. He looks so serious!

seashore subjects said...

He looks ready to me!

Al Bundy said...

If he doesn't reply, you could always try Mark McGwire.

Or is that another "Scratch that thought"?

Manic Mommy said...

You might want to ditch the azorbacks-Ray rug if you want him to take you more seriously. Hey, batter, batter, batter!

Otter Thomas said...

@Manic Mommy: NEVER!!!! I wish you could see the rest of Braden's room. The Razorbacks are everywhere and we love them.

Daddy Files said...

I love it.

And in all seriousness, you never know who's going to read this stuff on the Internet. Here's to hoping Braden gets the call up to the Show sooner than later!

Tessasdad said...

Great picture!

He's got a great staredown too!

Frogs in my formula said...

Wow, I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Mocha Dad said...

If Albert doesn't respond, I'll help the little fella.

surprised mom said...

Braden looks so confident! I don't see how anyone could refuse him! I would think it was a stich if Albert Pujols (who is he?) read this and offered to fly all of you down to Florida for spring training! Now there would be a vacation story to tell!

WeaselMomma said...

Your nuts and I love it!
Good Luck in Florida, I'm sure your on your way after this.