Friday, May 8, 2009

Does Being a Dad Make Me Different?

Hank Jr. once sang about how corn bread and iced tea took the place of pills and 90 proof. That type of drastic change was not necessary for me. Then again I was never a famous country music singer. You can also find plenty of blog posts about how becoming a Dad had the same effect on many guys. Those posts are full of comments like "I used to be up until 6 am Saturday morning chasing babes. Now I get up at 6 am on Saturday morning to change a babe's diaper."

Those are all fine and good but this will not be that kind of post. Settling down for me was more a function of finding the right woman and getting married than becoming a father. This post will be more of a philosophical look at whether I am a different person now that I have a child. After all if you can't get philosophical with a bunch of people you have never met then what good is this Internet thing anyway.

Upon thinking about this subject I decided looking at my interests would be a good place to start. I still love watching Cardinals baseball, Razorback Football, and Razorback Basketball. No change there. I still think that stupid movies like Caddyshack, The Jerk, Anchorman, and Blazing Saddles are hilarious. Obviously there is no growth in that area. What about non TV hobbies. Fishing and Hunting are still my favorites. So far I seem like the same guy.

While I still enjoy the same things I certainly spend my time differently now. I spend less time doing all the above things. I spend more time taking care of Braden via the arts of diaper changing, feeding, entertaining, and fighting him to sleep. Some people might say I have changed because now I am more responsible. That is not entirely true. Yes, I have more responsibilities now for sure, but I was always responsible. I made good grades, got a college scholarship and kept it until graduation. Then I got a job. I have kept my job, bought a house, paid all my bills, and fulfilled all other obligations. I think my actions are different now because my circumstances have changed, not because I have changed.

Something happened in my mind this week that brought up this whole thought process. I was holding Braden when he started making the "poop face". Some pooping noises and a pungent odor followed. I assumed he had done the deed. I went to change him and found that I was mistaken. We went back to playing in the living room. Braden continued to try and expel the foulness that was plaguing him. He was working very hard. I felt bad for him. More sounds and smells followed. I checked and he had broken free a small nugget. I decided to wait a few minutes and let him finish his grunting and groaning. When I went to change his nugget filled diaper I got a surprise. The dam had broken. The diaper was full. Instead of being totally revolted by this colorful, stinking, disaster in my son's diaper I found a great example for children everywhere. There is definitely a moral to this story.

If at first you don't succeed. Try. Try again.

I can go on and on about how I am the same person, but my thoughts seem to show that there has at least been a little brain damage.

16 comments:

BellaDaddy said...

OK, this was a classic post! Good Going! Despite our obvious differences (lol), we all share the same...daddy-hood!

Andrew's Daddies said...

You are one of my favorite posters. Great post. I'm glad Braden was able to succeed :D

WeaselMomma said...

You will alays b the same person and enjoy lots of the same things. Your priorities and perspective change as you see something in life that is more important than yourself. You're doing a great job and Happy Mother's day to Arica.

Isabella said...

It's amazing how many life lessons can be learned from poop. :)

SurprisedMom said...

I think people fundamentally stay the same, but their actions change as they go through various phases of life. That is why right now in this time and place you are cheering poopy diapers instead of fishing. Glad Braden found a, shall I say it, happy ending to his efforts. Fun post. I enjoy reading your blog.

Daddy Files said...

You hit the nail on the head with this one. I'm the exact same person with the exact same beliefs, likes and dislikes. Will didn't change that. The only thing that changed is how I spend my time now, like you said.

Anne said...

While I don't think it changes your interests, ideas, beliefs, etc., it definitely changes your perspective. Before you had Braden, I am sure you would be completely repulsed with the idea of cleaning up someone else's poop. Now you do it as a matter of course.

Jason said...

I agree with what everyone else has been posting. Your life doesn't change, just your priorities.

Tom said...

Dain bramage. It happeens to all uf us dads eventualllllly. After a wile, you don't reely mind, though... Hey, look! a chicken.

PJ Mullen said...

I'm definitely not any different either, although I do need to slow down the swear train. I need to build a man cave so I can watch football away from the family.

KWG said...

Oh, they will try and try again. Over and over and over again. Never thought I'd see so much poop.

But without focused struggling red poop face there would be no perseverance.

Remember that the next time you're in the bathroom!

HeirApparent said...

Great post and I definitely agree - I don't think our underlying selves change, and for the most part neither do our interests - all the old hobbies just get moved to when the kids are sleeping...

Out-Numbered said...

True Dat.

Mocha Dad said...

Kids change your life in ways you can never imagine.

Unknown said...

Having my son didn't change me as a person but what I did notice was that it changed how i think about a lot of things....

Steely Dad said...

Great post, man. I changed as a person when I had kids. For example, I didn't know that I could change diapers in a dark movie theater. I also didn't know that I had bionic hearing just like the bionic woman. I also have "daddy" sense when things get too quiet. Who knew?