Friday, March 13, 2009

Where Can I Find Dad Training?

We all enter this wild world of fatherhood with no training and virtually no good advice. Of course there is plenty of advice but notice that I said good advice. The only thing I was told, over and over again, was to get plenty fo sleep before our son's arrival. Everyone goes on and on about the lack of sleep. One of my friends even gave me a prescription for Ambien. Of course he is in no way, shape, or form a doctor so I suppose he was kidding. At least I hope he was kidding. There are a million things you need to know or learn in order to be a good dad, but there seems to be no way to learn these skills other than trial and error.

I received several years of training in order to be an engineer. Accountants have their special training and CPA exams. Doctor's and Lawyers have their own post graduate schools to prepare them for their careers. Fatherhood is the most important job that any man will ever have, and there is no training available. Your wife has a baby, and bang, just like that you are a dad. Never fear my friends I have found a wonderful place to turn for dad training. That place is Clown School.

It makes perfect sense as a training ground for new dads. In the beginning you are the child's only means of entertainment. I have found myself singing, dancing, making faces, and every other stupid thing you can imagine. A dad could benefit from learning to perform under pressure as well. Sometimes your child is screaming and only your actions or gestures can make them stop. It is like the kid is on fire and you just want to put him out, yet you don't know what will actually quench the fire. That is the kind of performance under pressure that clown school can help you with. I am certain that the skills learned in clown school could be applied to fit all your needs and molded to include all your kid's toys. After all, isn't a clown's job to entertain kids?

I looked into the Academy of Performing Arts in Clowning and found that their list of courses absolutely backs up my idea. You can see the entire list here. I think we can skip the courses on The Clown Look. I don't know about you personally, but I look like a clown quite enough without the makeup. The next category is a virtual treasure chest of skills that every dad could use. Some of them are balloon twisting, juggling, puppetry, crafts, games, storytelling, and bubbles. Maybe you are the type of dad that likes to plan out a performance. Clown School has the courses you need under comedy material including skit performance, physical comedy, and the use of props. If you are not already contemplating signing up for clown school then hear this. They even give you guidelines for use in all the places you take your kids like restaurants, daycare, parties, and church.

I am sad that I am just thinking of this now. I could have been better prepared for the job of entertaining Braden. I could have been better prepared next time a "fire" breaks out in the restaurant or at a birthday party. It may be too late for me but please tell all your friends who are expecting. There is finally a place where us new dads can learn the skills needed to survive.

17 comments:

Andrew's Daddies said...

Great post. My suggestion on this is just follow your child, he will tell you exactly what to do to keep him entertained.

Sounds kind-a-cool though. Daddy Classes.

Before we adopted our baby, we were trained by nurses on all the proper ways of changing diapers, feeding, burping. They were so sweet to us.

DaddyKV said...

I feel ya. I have a 5 month old daughter and your speak the truth. :)

Daddy Files said...

I would've rather gone to clown school instead of the birthing classes. Those things sucked.

Jason said...

Classes would have definitely helped. Nobody is prepared for their new life as a father, nor the role of clown that promptly follows.

Isabella said...

Clown school...interesting. :) Maybe throw some improv / theatre (both acting and crew) training in there as well. I know my previous theatre training has certainly helped me along in this new mom process.

Happy Fatherhood Friday!

New-Dad-Blog said...

That is the problem; any a-hole can produce a kid, but it takes someone dedicated and loving to become a father.

All you can do is your best man. At least that's what I am doing. .

Ryan@Cool Dad Central said...

Yeah, that does cover the basics. Of course you also have to add in some EMT training and you should about have it covered.

Otter Thomas said...

@Andrew's Daddies: He is pretty well a happy baby and I am crazy so I have no trouble entertaining him.

@DaddyKV: Glad to know someone out there understands.

@Daddy Files: Believe it or not our child birth classes werre pretty fun. Our teacher was funny as hell.

@Jason: I was more prepared for the clown part than some of the other parts.

@Isabella: improv and theater are a good idea too. Pretending always helps.

@New-Dad: You are right. It just takes love, time, and effort.

@Ryan: EMT training could never hurt.

MileHighDad said...

Hang in the dude! It just gets... different! I am having issues myself right now with this gig, so don't let my post affect you. Overall it is a 9.9995 job, only Olga or Nadia would do better!

Tom said...

Excellent idea! If anyone is more equipped to take a plateful of food in the face than a clown, I don't know who it would be.

If you can learn how to juggle, that's a bonus too - i never could get the timing down.

CaJoh said...

But just like we never get any training for marriage, we don't get any for parenting either. I think all of our training comes from what we feel should make a good parent and applying that. I also think that being resourceful doesn't hurt either.

Thanks for stopping by,

Otter Thomas said...

@MileHighDad: Thanks for the support. I am not down. Being a Dad is the greatest job ever.

@Tom: I could never juggle. I get confused.

@CaJoh: Resourcefulness is definately a good tool for the tool box.

Mocha Dad said...

On the job training is all that we have. Make the most of it.

john said...

clown school huh?...lol. sounds like a plan to me.

Rob said...

I just enrolled in clown school. I hope it works, LOL, like the site and articles. Keep it up!

ciara said...

i don't know, clowns are SCARY lol

WeaselMomma said...

It's all trial and error. You get thrown into the fire, plain and simple, but soon you will find yourself getting quite good at it. Next time you will already have the skill set you need.