I Want to Spend 2010 With My Family

I have just returned to work today from my second consecutive 4 day weekend.  In other words I have only worked 3 days out of the past 11.  I am not too excited about going back to work this morning.

In the past several days I have had a wonderful time staying at home with Arica and Braden.  It is a nice way to end what was at times a very difficult 2009.  I worked so much this year in the US and abroad that time with my family was sometimes neglected.  A four day weekend cannot take away the disappointment of missing Braden's first Halloween while marooned on a rainy island teeming with bagpipes. Nor can it erase a summer filled with dread about travel plans.  The days off do, however, provide a great springboard into what I hope is a better life this year.

As I look forward to 2010 I want to spend as much of it as possible with my family. I want to be there when they have bad days. I want to be there for every single holiday no matter how small. I want to take a real vacation this year with my wife, if not several.

To many people travelling to the capital of kilts for business seems like a great job.  Maybe a life full of movement and travel is what you crave. Not me. Of course I would like it if I could take my family along, but with a 13 month old kid that is not really feasible. The best thing for us is just being together right in our own hometown.

Many days at home in this parenting journey seem so mundane and difficult. Another load of dishes. Another dirty diaper. Supper time. Bath time. Bed time. Somewhere in between there is grocery shopping or household chores. I used to just get irritated with all of this. Sometimes I wasn't too pleasant.

For this I apologize to my family. The reality is that these little tasks are what makes up life with a small child. If you take them away there is not much left.  If I can't enjoy diapers and dishes then I can't enjoy life. So with this realization and a hopefully reformed attitude I venture into what has become a snowy (at least for Arkansas) 2010. I will undertake this adventure with hopes of wonderfully normal days ahead filled with toys and tater tots with my family.

Happy New Year.

Modern Family

I love the new ABC comedy Modern Family. It is one of the funniest new shows I have seen in quite a while. Besides being funny it also gives us real proof that Ed O'Neil did not fall off the face of the earth after "Married With Children." If you are a fan of the nearly extinct genre once known as the sitcom I highly recommend that you watch. Below is a clip from the show.


The show also has me thinking today about how families welcome new members and how they survive many of the changes in today's family life. Families like the one depicted in the show are more and more common. Our family is pretty normal, but we can learn a bit from the show as well.

My family growing up was very conservative. They still are. I was raised inside a tight knit group that very rarely welcomed any outsiders. If you married someone unlike the rest of the family you were asking for trouble. The new blood would not be turned away, but they might not be treated as well as they should.

I am not talking about differences anything like you see in the show above or anything like you see in much of America. I am talking about a different home life, a different way of handling conflict, a different church life, different parenting, or any other number of minor differences. I don't mean Muslim vs. Christian, heterosexual vs. homosexual, or vegetarian vs. carnivore. The differences need only to be minute to raise an eyebrow.

As you may have guessed by now I have been a victim of this type of behavior. Arica and I have struggled with my family for years now. It is a difficult thing to go through for anyone. I can't help but watch this fictional TV show with all their problems and all their differences and wish my life more closely resembled their dysfunction. I can only dream of a situation where differences can be accepted and even celebrated. Most importantly I would love a situation where differences made us stronger rather than tore us apart.

I have never written a Christian message in this space before. It is a big part of my life, but I am not comfortable preaching as I am sure most of you are not comfortable being preached too. For once I will break that rule. My daily bible reading today was 1 Corinthians 13. Most all of you readers are familiar with this text whether you are Christian or not. It was even recited in the decidedly non-religious movie "Wedding Crashers."

The part I want to share today is this "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails"

Any "Modern Family" can be strong and accepting of anything as long as they have love. I hope all of you experience this type of love in your family life today and always.