Fruit and Flower Anniversary

I have used this blog to tell the story of How We Met. I have also been sentimental on this occasion in the past. I always feel that my words are hopelessly weak and fruitless in any attempt to describe how I feel about Arica. I am not skilled enough to put such deep and passionate emotions on paper.

How can anyone with a little corner of the internet adequately proclaim their love by posting a couple hundred words that will be read mostly by people they have never met. Furthermore, why would I do that?

In the past I have felt that it was a good tribute to my wife. I felt it must feel good for her to receive such words in much the same way it feels good for a woman to receive flowers in front of her co-workers. I am sure Arica enjoyed the kind words, but wouldn't they be better suited to go straight from my mouth into her ears.

On that note I think I will take the romantic post I have waiting in my drafts section and put it on a real piece of paper. Then I will either give Arica that piece of paper or read it to her by candlelight or maybe even tattoo it on my arm.

Either way this year there will be no posturing on a blog. I will share only with my beloved wife how I truly feel. After four years of dealing with me she certainly could stand a romantic gesture.

Before ending this post I want to share a couple stories about our wedding day. That day before the ceremony my little cousin, serving as the flower girl, asked her mom several times where the princess was. She would also say she wanted to see the princess.This innocent little girl was talking about my bride to be. She was spot on with her description. Arica looked absolutely beautiful that day, just like a princess. And she has been an absolute princess every day since that. Not just in her looks either. She is just as beautiful in her heart.

Later on our wedding day, at the reception, one of my friends Dad's made another insightful comment about my new wife. As the wedding video went around this man had his David Spade in Tommy Boy moment. He was several beers into the night when he proclaimed to the camera, "Arica, you must need glasses because you are way too pretty for Robert."

So here she is the princess that is way too good looking for me. I can't say that I disagree. Happy Anniversary Arica!

Wordy Wednesday

Much of the Dad blogging community participates in Wordless Wednesday. This requires posting a picture on your site and that is all. I am not one of those Dads. I figure if I wanted to have wordless posts I would have started a picture album rather than a blog. To each their own I guess.

Still this is the third straight Wednesday that I have posted pictures from our vacation. This vacation ended a month ago, but I am still reporting like it is breaking news. When you have a cute kid and a talented photographer for a wife you have a lot to share.

So here is the final installment of our vacation pictures. They include Silver Dollar City Theme Park and the water park.

This isn't the water park, but Braden insisted that he wear his swimming suit that day. Turns out he knew what he was talking about.

Braden having yet another Coke on the trip. Vacation is meant for fun. He hasn't had one since.

Me and Braden shooting some ball gun thing. I had to beat up three kids to get a gun.

Arica and Braden riding the water gun boat. I stood along side and shot water at the boat.

All three of us after several water gun battles.

Braden at the water park.

Braden in the water tunnel with a shirtless man lurking behind.

Over One Billion Served

Last week we had another major milestone development in our family. We were driving down the road to pick up Arica's car from the body shop where it had some paint repaired. We passed a building that everyone in America would recognize, and on this day Braden recognized it too.

From the back seat Arica and I heard "nunnet, nunnet" as Braden pointed out the window. He had just recognized McDonald's for the first time, and he wanted some chicken nuggets.

Before all you health nuts go crazy you you should know that we only feed Braden McDonald's 5 times a week. I think it is good for him to have a well rounded diet so we save the other two days for pizza and burritos.

Seriously though he gets a Happy Meal from time to time like most other kids. In my opinion the bigger threat to our kids health is technology. Sitting inside with video games and computers day after day in lieu of exercise is much worse than having a cheeseburger or chicken nugget.

Either way it's fun to see your kids recognize the world around them whether it be a McDonald's or the organic tofu market.

I Am Never Wrong

My mother once gave me a shirt that said "You can either agree with me or be wrong." I thought it was funny because I was rather proud of that aspect of my personality. Arica didn't think it was funny because living with someone like that is a pain.

It turns out Arica was right. That type of attitude isn't funny.

Since I became a father I have spent a good amount of time evaluating myself. I have taken time to look more closely at my strengths and weaknesses.  I have never been one to admit my weakness or vulnerability before, but now it is not just about me. If I am not careful all my bad habits will become Braden's. I need to change my bad habits and set a good example. This is important because I want Braden to be a better man than me.

Upon reflection it's very clear that I have always thought I was right in every situation. I would argue and correct people. I wouldn't accept that someone else might be right. It never entered my mind. I am often still like this, but I am trying to change. The problem with figuring this out (with loving help from Arica) after having Braden is that change has to come quickly. If I am unable to change my actions Braden will surely mimic them regardless of what I tell him. Actions speak louder than words.

I am trying to change because I don't want Braden to always think he is right. I do want him to have confidence in his decisions and in his knowledge. I don't want him to second guess himself. I just want him to listen to others and be open minded without arguing every single point with everyone. This behavior is not only annoying, but it causes other problems as well.

The first problem with feeling you always have to be right is that it limits creativity. I have a black and white view of the world. This leads me to thought patterns of right or wrong with no in between. If someone is doing something different than me then it must be wrong.

That is a terribly limiting way to see the world. There is obviously more than one way to skin a cat. The truly successful people in the world are always looking for new ways to do things. They listen to every idea and determine if it is good or bad based solely on its merit not on its relationship to previous ideas. I want Braden to be confident of himself and his work, but not to the point of arrogance. Arrogance leads to close mindedness, and we all know that is a bad thing.

The other major problem that results from an obsession with being right is the development of a fear of being wrong. This often manifests as a fear of failure.  I often found this problem with myself. At times in my life I was afraid to speak out or to try something new because I couldn't stand to look stupid. I couldn't bear it if I was wrong or worse terribly wrong and inadequate. A fear of failure not only limits success, but it also limits how much fun you can have in your life.

So I am working on my way of thinking. I hope I am able to show Braden how to consider all people's viewpoints and ways of doing things. I hope I can help him become open minded. It is my dream that he becomes a man with no fear of failure, like that man Teddy Roosevelt once spoke about in this famous quote:

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

What's Your Favorite Animal?

George Costanza was once interviewing candidates for a scholarship from the Susan Ross foundation. This was something he didn't really want to do, and his methods were interesting to say the least. Here is an excerpt from one of those interviews.

George: Quick, what's your favorite animal?

Candidate: I don't know...Frog?
George: Frog?
Candidate: Well...I...I..
George: Frog is wrong.

We went to the St. Louis Zoo on our vacation a couple weeks ago and I got to see my favorite animal, the tiger. Below are pics of that and much more, including Braden's favorite animal the "mummy".

Braden looking at a live version of a mummy.

Braden checking out a mummy picture.

I have seen Madagascar 2 way too many times on HBO. I kept imagining this zebra talking like Chris Rock.

Braden did the Build-a-Bear thing.

Except he built a Penguin. His choice.

.

Later he picked up this girl. She just climbed right in his ride. I was beaming with pride. You can see my right arm and leg beaming in the picture.

Don't worry. It's not the peyote. Braden really is sitting on a giant blue frog.

No comment. I just liked this picture.

Here we all are at the zoo for photographic evidence.

The little man finally just gave out from animal overload.